Still Fighting

I’m STILL working on trying to figure out how to get my body to work again. I’m going to physical therapy once a week, seeing different physicians and just trying to get it figured out. It’s tough now that we actually have some decent snow to not be out on the hill. The crazy part is that I was ski racing for months (maybe years) with my hip not in the socket properly and now that it’s all fixed up I’m worse off than I was the day before my surgery. I KNOW I needed this surgery and it wasn’t an option, but now I just want my body back.

The first races of the season are next week but for the first time since 2003 I won’t be starting. That's hard emotionally but I know there are worse things in life other than not being able to ski race.

I’m trying to be smart and take care of my body rather than beat it up. I haven't skied since opening day and I'm hoping the extra time off snow will pay off, maybe just maybe things are about to turn around. It'd be so nice to be back to work on the ambulance and back out in sun and the snow skiing. I'm not holding my breath, but I'm hopeful.

First Day Back

These days it seems that things just don’t go as planned. My first day back on snow was not an exception to this and did NOT go as I had hoped. It was nice to be back out in the sunshine and on the snow, but beyond that my day was not very fun. I didn’t think I had high expectations but apparently even my low expectations were too high for my ability at the moment. For the first time since I was young I felt inept. I am good skier and to feel like a beginner was very disheartening. I know that I didn’t ski as bad as I felt but it was still very poor skiing. I was on the only open slope, which is a green run. Usually I just bomb around and make lap after lap but I was only able to make it through 4 runs. This was beyond my goal of one but it was by sheer will. My right leg just wouldn’t cooperate with me and I had very little control of my hip. Putting pressure on my right leg was a challenge mentally and physically. I walked away from the day very disappointed and nervous about my ability to ski. I’m crossing my fingers that it will truly just be a matter of time before I’ll get it back. I'm not giving up, but it appears that I'll have to give myself more time than I thought, my race season seems to really be slipping away, I want so bad for this to be temporary!

Start of the 2008 Ski Season

15 November. Six and a half months post-op and my life is still not back to normal. I’d like to say that little by little things are getting better but that is not necessarily true.

My sensation did finally start to improve last week but my mobility and function are still much more limited than I think they should or want them to be. Yesterday, while at work for a class, I tried to lift a pram (cot) with a teaching dummy on it (who weighs like 100lbs) and was able to do it but barely. As soon as I got it into the lock position I nearly fell over as my leg just recoiled underneath me. Maybe my expectations are too high, maybe I’m not doing the right things to get better, I don’t know. Either way, it’s been difficult. I decided today as I was coming home from teaching a class that I want to try to ski, before the ski area opens. I ran into one of my WP coaches it’s either tomorrow or Monday…
… so tomorrow it is! This may not be one of my brightest moments but I have to try, and if it doesn’t go well then I know my season really won’t start for awhile. And if I make it through a run or two and can still walk at the end of the day, the light at the end of the tunnel will be shinning a lot brighter. I have no expectations, my goal is to simply get my boots on, get to the lift, and make it through one run without falling over or crying. Who know maybe it’ll go great and I’ll ski the whole morning. I’ll do a test run with my boots tonight and hope for the best tomorrow.

Below is a photo of my friend T saddling up her horse Casey for me to ride with her and then another of my Aunt Nancy with me riding the horse JR at my Mom/ Aunt’s ranch in Iowa. They say horseback riding is good therapy right?!

Summer Fun

As I said before, my recovery is NOT going as planned. It's only been about 3 weeks now that I've finally been without crutches- yeah! The reason I was finally able to get off my crutches is that they changed my medication from Valium to Neurontin (yes I’ve really been on Valium since surgery.) I don't know why the Neurontin is working but it is, even my fever is being kept at bay. That was a long time coming. This whole thing has been one big challenge. Fever, nausea, vomiting, pain, and spasms for months, not fun.

Now that I'm off crutches it is very obvious that my muscles just don't seem to want to work with the pelvis now in a new position. In theory it should be a lot better but it just hasn't really worked out that way. So I'm still trying to work on it and trying to get back to normal, but still not working.

Because of all this I didn't get much of a summer but I was lucky enough to get out to the east coast and NYC. I had a great trip with my friend Annie and then my Dad joined us and we went to a Yankees game. Annie went home and Dad and I drove up to Gloucester, MA where my mom joined us and we visited some long time family friends. Here are some photos from that trip!

Periacetabular Osteotomy

So it's been a month today since my surgery. Recovery has been anything but easy. I seem to run into one obstacle after another. Thankfully I’ve had lots of friends and family support to help me get through this. My problems began in the hospital when I I had to receive 3 units of blood because I was bleeding internally. Then, my 2 large bore IV’s both got irritated and had to be removed. Of course after that happened I started vomiting and couldn’t hold anything down including my medications, which made pain control very troublesome. Finally they got another IV started and were able to get the vomiting under control and was released about 5 days after surgery. Since being released from the hospital I have been at parents outside of Denver in Bennett. My parents have been really good and supporting through everything. My little sister Amy has come out here to help out quite a bit too. I just want to feel better. A big thanks to all that have called and come to visit because that’s what’s helping me get through this.

Another Leap

I recently found out that I need to have another surgery.

This caught me completely off guard. I have been having some problems with my right hip for a while now, and I finally went to see someone. They took a bunch of x-rays and I went to see the hip specialist, Dr. Sink. He is a pediatric surgeon but he’s supposed to be one of the best with hips. During my appointment he went over my x-rays with me, told me the problem and then told me how he’d like to fix it. Basically, my femur is not in the socket properly and this is causing damage to the socket, pelvis and femur. Unfortunately, the surgery sounds absolutely horrendous. They will cut my pelvis in a couple different places, reposition my femur and the pelvic bones, then put in screws and pins to hold everything in place. The surgery is scheduled for 29th of April at The Children’s Hospital in Aurora. I’m not sure what the recovery entails but I’m sure a lot of hard work, so I’m putting on my game face and getting ready for a rough summer.

Ski TAM

Once again Ski TAM was a huge party and a lot of fun. I always enjoy the chance to get out in Vail and ski with sponsors. Steve and all the folks with Scientific Atlanta/ Cisco are always very good to me and make the weekend wonderful.

A highlight of the weekend was finding out that I have been nominated back to the U.S. Disabled Ski Team! I will be back on the team as a member of the D team. This means that I will train and travel and race with them but they will not support me financially at all. This is a win-win situation for me as I am still able to keep my own schedule and have no obligations to the team but will receive the benefits. This puts me in a better position to improve my racing. Financially, things could be more difficult but there are a lot of different factors involved so we’ll see how it plays out.

I was even more excited to learn that several of my Winter Park teammates made the team as well. Congrats to John Knudsen, Ricci Kilgore, Ian Jansing and John Whitney - way to go WP!